“Everything
is held together with stories: That is all that is holding us together, stories
and compassion” Barry Lopez from an interview in Poets and
Writers March/April 1994
I
am an inveterate used-book junkie. Anywhere I go I seek out used book stores
and can spend hours in them. I may come away with a treasure or
leave satisfied but empty handed.
While
visiting a dear friend I noticed for the first time not one but two used
bookstores in her neighborhood. In the second one I found a volume by a
favorite author that had as its dedication the Barry Lopez quote that begins
this blog. Like so many tidbits of wisdom, it struck me as both simple
and true. Yes, we all have stories. Some of our stories chronicle
our adventures and are the spice of our lives. But some others of our
stories step in and take over our lives. Check out the 3-part series I
did about Story in February and March of 2014.
Some
stories are teaching stories, serving to give us insight into mysteries beyond
our understanding. Other stories give us our history, tell us who we are
and where we have come from. Still others support our culture.
Sometimes they strengthen us or perhaps point out the need for change.
Then
there are the stories from our individual past: old habits that we slip into by
default rather than recognizing them. These stories may take over our
lives when we aren’t paying attention. Or creep out of the corners of our
self-image and the taste of old pain resurfaces. These are the stories
that require our courage.
And
our compassion.
This
combination of Courage and Compassion is one of the hallmarks of my point of
view in the world. Recently I facilitated a workshop in which I used
these two qualities as part of a deceptively simple breath work exercise
(Breathe in Courage, you will need it on your journey of self-awareness.
Breathe out Compassion because you are taking this journey.)
After
we worked with this concept for a while, someone spoke up.
“I
don’t understand”, she said “usually we breathe out what we want to get rid
of. I need all of the compassion I can muster for myself!”
I
love this question because it brings us to the core of our journeys, our own
untapped resilience.
“Yes,”
I replied “Frequently that is the way these kinds of exercises are led.
But I ask you, does it work?”
She
responded that maybe it helped, for a little while. But that, no, it
never lasted. Around the circle I saw nods of agreement. Then I
explained that what we take in (with our in-breath) is Life’s gift to us, but
what we give out (with our out-breath) is our gift to the world. So the
question becomes, what gift do we want to be able to give?
One
of my favorite bits of collected wisdom is, “Imagination is our most powerful
tool.” If we can imagine it we can, within the limits of finite reality,
create it. So if we can imagine ourselves being filled with Courage in
each breath, can we imagine ourselves transforming our vulnerabilities
into the compassion we so very much want? As a gift to ourselves, as a
gift to the world.
And
thus, the world becomes just a little bit more the way we wish it to be.
And our stories transform into stories of possibility and healing.
P.S. sometimes I change it up during breath work exercises. Sometimes I suggest breathing in compassion and breathing out courage. Or sometimes i work with gratitude or forgiveness. Experiment. What do you need to take in right now? What can you offer to the world?
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